Who's on First?

When's the last time you did something for the first time? I'll give you a minute.

Got something? It's tough to call that sort of thing to mind. I'm having a hard time doing it myself. It was probably some food I'd eaten for the first time. I had ossobucco for the first time a month or two back. But I'm sure there's been something else since then.

There were important firsts back in the day. First day of school, first kiss, first car. And I bet you can remember most of those things. I certainly can. But after you've lived a while, your firsts stop seeming important.

But when you're 11 and a half months old, all the firsts seem significant. There are new firsts practically every day. To be honest, there have been so many firsts for LG, I've probably let a few go past unremarked upon.

But in the spirit of first, her are a few firsts LG has had over the past week.

First Bacon
Two things. No, we didn't give her a piece that big. And no, there's no decent picture of her eating it herself. But she did, and she loved it. Though to be fair, she eats everything. Speaking of which...

First Spaghetti

I'm going to warn you ahead of time. These next few pictures are not for those with weak stomachs. You've heard someone say, "I'm so hungry, I could murder a cheeseburger and fries"? Well, that's what LG looks like she did to this pasta. It's a little gross.
Took a while to get that shot of spaghetti sticking out of her mouth. I'm pretty proud of that.
She was looking fairly pleased with herself as well. And then the bib came off.
I can't remember whether those red chunks are tomato or watermelon. It all got a bit fuzzy by the end. Pasta flying one direction, sauce flying the other. It was chaos.

First Booboo
I'll own up to it. This is my fault. On Monday, I was pushing her in her swing outside (probably higher than I ought to) when out of nowhere, a bird pooped on me. I was so startled that I stopped paying attention to LG for a second or two. Just long enough for the swing to twist slightly and scrape her leg against the tree. Ouch! She didn't cry for very long afterward; she rarely does when she hurts herself. But man did she sleep poorly that night. Up every 2 hours or so. Unpleasant.

First Toybox
We changed the layout of the living room again, and in the process we got LG a toybox for her stuff. As you'd expect, she spends most of her time taking things out of it. But we're working on the concept of putting things away. It's a slow process.

But one day, maybe I'll have a post about the first time she cleaned up her own mess.

In Which Bugs are Consumed

Sometime last week my mom told me that at some point, LG will probably eat dog food. Nothing to be done about it; it won't hurt her. But it will likely happen. I didn't disagree.

That brings us to last Sunday, when LG ate a bug... that I fed to her... on purpose.

Last weekend was Bug Fest at the Academy of Natural Sciences, where Hollie works. I took LG in to check out the exhibits and visit Hollie. I did not go with the intention of feeding her bugs, but, you know, an opportunity presented itself.

Lest you think I swiped a random arthropod from a display table and popped it in her mouth, this was at the end of a bug cooking demo. We missed the portion of the program where the cook prepared these little guys, but I didn't want to pass up the chance to try the extras.
Those are fried crickets, sprinkled with spices, which, if I had to guess, included salt, chili powder, and cayenne. I hesitated a second or two before letting LG eat these, but it was more because of the spicy hotness than the fact that these were bugs.

As it turned out, LG loved 'em. This is not surprising, however. As I've mentioned before, she'll eat almost anything. And for that, I am glad.

I know it may change. I know there's a high degree of likelihood that at some point in the next six months, she'll refuse to eat anything except for hot dogs and white bread. But while it lasts, she'll get whatever we eat, and then some.

In the last two weeks, she's had fish, indian food, (which included tamarind, water chestnuts and baby corn, among other things), Five Guys french fries (fried in peanut oil), and any one of numerous things she's found on the floor that I'm not fast enough to grab out of her mouth.

I know we're lucky that she doesn't have any food allergies, so I thank the Flying Spaghetti Monster (with tomato sauce, which she also eats) for that.

My Kid Could Shoot That

I'm not above exploiting my child for fame and fortune, which is why I've decided LG will be a world famous photographer by the time she's 2 years old. I've only got 13 months, so it's time to get cracking.

I handed her the camera yesterday, just to see what kind of natural talent she has.

As I expected, her first attempt yielded a self portrait. Eleven months old, and she's already a narcissist.
Next, she turned the camera away from herself for a piece I call "Hold Still, Daddy"
Note how she's decided that faces aren't necessary for a properly composed shot.

Using that photo as inspiration, she decided on a theme for her first exhibition.

We call these "Left" and "Right." Why yes, armpits are an excellent metaphor for the American political system. Provocative, yet astute.

This might've gone on for a while, but she was momentarily distracted by a neighbor's dog that was off its leash. Unfortunately, no photographic evidence exists of this interlude, because she got so excited she dropped the camera.

When she picked it back up, she decided that a nice landscape might break up the theme a little bit.Note the strategically placed finger in the lower right portion of the lens. There are no accidents here, people.

Turning the camera back on herself, she decided to get raw... personal... in. your. face.
The art practically consumes you. Or rather, this next picture consumes you.
Her hunger for the avant-garde thus sated, we close the exhibition with a piece titled, "What are you looking at?"
My daughter the photographer. It might not be as good as a monkey with a camera, but then, you can always blame the equipment.

The 2nd Law of Thermodynamics

So the DC Comics universe has this concept of Order versus Chaos (not super original, but few comics ideas are). Various characters in the comics are embodiments of these two cosmic forces. Nabu, a Lord of Order, gives power to the hero Dr. Fate. Mordru, a Lord of Chaos, is a villain. But it's not always that clear cut. Hawk and Dove, two lesser heroes in DC canon, are given their power by the Lords of Chaos and Order, respectively. Neither Chaos, nor Order, is inherently bad or good, but two must exist in balance with one another.

All of that is just background to my main point. I think my daughter is a miniature Lord of Chaos.

Kids are messy. This isn't news. But I have never seen any child so young so committed to disorder as LG. Most kids will knock down a block tower shortly after you construct it. But she doesn't just knock down the stack. She terminates the tower--with extreme prejudice. It's not just stacks, either. LG has a set of stacking/nesting cups from IKEA. If she's around, these cups will be neither stacked nor nested. She prefers it if the cups are flung to the far corners of the room.

She's been doing that for a while, but her newest pastime is removing all of the objects from a container. She will take LEGOs out of her tub, one brick at a time, until the tub is empty. And then she's done. She doesn't play with them once they're free from their plastic prison. The game is just taking them out. As an experiment, I sat next to her while she took the bricks out, and as she removed bricks, I put them back in. She didn't get upset. She just kept going. We must've sat there for 10 minutes, taking bricks out, putting bricks back.

And it's not just toys either. I walked to the kitchen to get some iced tea yesterday, leaving her to take all the toys out of her toy box. She was uncommonly quiet while I was gone, always a bad sign. When I got back?

This:
That's a bag full of documents that need to be shredded.

A minute or so later?
People were coming over later, so I had to clean up. I moved her to the opposite side of the room, and tried to gather the papers up. I have never seen LG move as fast as she trucked across the living room just then. She DID NOT WANT those papers to go back in the bag.

And lest you think it's just toys and paper, let me show you why I can't fold laundry while she's awake.
This does not bode well for her keeping her room tidy as a teenager.

The Geeky, the Cute, and the Developmental (not mutually exclusive)

The Geeky

Hollie is on kind of a big Doctor Who kick right now. Although saying that is a bit like saying I've been on a breathing kick lately. Suffice to say, she loves the show. Don't get me wrong, so do I, but it's refreshing to have this one nerdy thing out there that she's slightly more passionate about than I am. (Our daughter might be named after a character on the show. Shhh!) That said, despite what her office cube might look like (covered in Doctor Who paraphernalia), there's actually very little Doctor Who stuff in our house. The odd sonic screwdriver pen, sure, but that's sort of handy.

But we do have this little cell phone fob hanging on the side of the refrigerator.
It's quite small, has never been attached to a cell phone, and to my knowledge, it's never actually worked. But it hangs there looking all TARDIS-y, and it is undeniably attractive baby bait.

You cannot open the fridge with LG in your arms. You cannot walk past the fridge with LG in your arms. Frankly, you can't go anywhere near the fridge if you'd hold LG. Because she will grab it.

Every. Single. Time.

And it should be noted: There are at least three dozen magnets and assorted papers on the fridge to which she pays absolutely no attention.

Hollie has taken to teaching her the basics of the Doctor Who theme when she grabs it. (Sing it if you know it! Oooo-weee-ooooooo!) I've got no hard evidence of LG performing it, but she often does respond with "oooo-oooo-oooo!" But she might just be excited that she's managed to grab the darn thing yet again.

The Cute

Seriously. How has it taken this long to get my daughter in a makeshift cape?

LG has been spending a lot of time in the pool at Hollie's parents' house, but this is the first time I've had the chance to get in there with her. This is one of my favorite faces. She makes it when she's really intrigued by something. In this case, that would be the pool ladder for some reason.

The Developmental
I have no idea what stage of development this is, but it shows that she's learning, which is exciting to me. We had some friends over last weekend, and toward the end of her evening, about an hour before bedtime, she started acting sleepy. And when she gets sleepy, she sometimes makes her way to the nearest pillow and:
But when she first did it, all four of us let out a collective "Awwww....". Which she liked so much, she laid her head down again, and again, and again. Eventually, she started laying down, but looking up, so she could see our reaction.
It's good to know I'm raising a ham. But as least she understands cause and effect.

Apropos of nothing, here is another picture of her looking intrigued by something, in this case a Shellie Mae bear courtesy of Auntie K-K and Unkie Don.